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Going Against the Grain

Katherine Ryder Published: February 1, 2012 10:11 AM

When it comes to natural ability, or even talent developed through practice, there can sometimes be a struggle between what we want to do and what we should do.

No matter what your family dynamic, what mentors have taught you, what friends have advised you; there comes a time in everyone's life when they need to make a decision about who they are going to be.

For most of us, we reach a general decision about half-way through college. There are some who know before they step foot in high school (for them I am envious). And there are some who figure it out just a few years before retirement.

Our paths of school, experience, internships, first jobs, second jobs...third jobs, mostly teach us what we don't like. The path is narrowed and we're left at a turning point.

Either we continue with our current path, or...we deviate.

With my upcoming nuptials fast approaching I feel like this particular decision is weighing somewhat heavily.

I've found a niche, as most post-college graduates do, and I'm content and comfortable. The inevitability is deciding what I should do after my prefix changes. What happens when I turn from Ms. to Mrs.?

A new town. A new home. A new opportunity.

It's naive to think decisions such as these are made by a singular party. The transition of I to We has begun and the truth is, it's not just my life anymore, but someone else's as well.

Talent or intrigue can often be thrown to the wayside when realistic responsibilities arise. We'll be setting up house, saving for a future, planning our new life together. The ambitions I had when I was younger, the plans of achievement become less possible with each stepping stone.

It's a balancing act, making compromises for each other, deciding which direction you want your life to go.

But like anything in life, since when do things go as we plan? What life has taught me most so far is to stop planning, take a leap and see where you fall.

Chances are it will be better than you expect.


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